Thoughts of a Stoner..


Here last night I sat before quite past when you should have been in bed I’m sure.

But this is every night for me lately so many before.

The bugs sucked in by my repellent candles thinking it candy assuredly.

Then I notice the bugs flying closest to me were slowly slowing no longer flying hurriedly.

They started swaying and swirling and twirling just as up the smoke from my pipe was rising.

Here I sit again all day

stoning all my flys by away

By GammaRaex




Mosquitos flying all around your arms and legs leaving no spots
Christ can’t they leave alone to smoke your bit of good pot?
No heroin in a year.. except, (well that time doesn’t count!)
Blood suckers
These are your real vampire not that sparkly pretty man your young hearts desire.
You wish to call upon darkness without knowing anything.
To power only do you hope to find and cling.
Like a mosquito to a warm blooded body.

Rambling poet


Twist and turn
Washing machine jumble
Spin cycle
Silks and Lingerie no one gets an easy tumble
Break and Fall
Tall buildings easily crumble
Strong people can easily crumble
Not too close!
I haven’t taken my nightly dose.
Down and low
Sit and spin
Start and go
Lose and win
Can’t put humpty together again
Catch and release
Where’s your peace?
Go to the pawn shop, buy a piece.
But who will you want to kill with shot to the head?
Some one whom has done you wrong or yourself and the things your brain tells you instead.
Back and forth, sways
Your help made her a zombie
Disillusioned; constant haze
So she quit your couches and pills.
Now she takes her own drugs that giver her her fills.
Constant motion
She still often sways
She’ll probably be slightly off always until the end of her days
Closed casket
Bury no hatchet
Please, don’t look upon my death.
Freezing, but you can’t see my breath?
In the fridge an empty jar
In a closed garage, turns on the car
Carbon monoxide
Disinfect with peroxide
Bubbles will pop
Music won’t stop
Still in constant motion
Burned and pealing
Despite protective lotion
Getting confused
What’s happening to me?
Am I really dying, could it be?
Threw up
When she tried to drink the ocean
Dizzy, whirling wonder
Can I have the lightening, hold the thunder?
And do you know that ‘til this day
I always sit and swing
If a playgrounds on my way
Did it hit you?
Or did you catch the train?
Every culture idealizes beauty as pain.
The sky is full of just old light.
Yet I still sit up and stare every night
Kick and fight
Wrong and right
Seek or hide
Climb now slide
Noe sit.
I quit.

Turn the lights off


The sun is blinding upstairs yet the air is cold and harsh.

A light switch is flicked on in the basement where we were lying.

We had just finished inject ourselves a little cloer to dying.

Revealing cracked walls and spiders that had gone unnoticed.

Turn off the light.

It’s far too brigt!

The things I see, the spider webs, cracks and paint peeling.

This must stop for I despise this feeling.

I wish to remain ignorant.

Allow me my bliss, let me remain dumb.

Give me just this so I can always stay happy and numb.

Leave me in the dark.

Don’t say a word.

It’s better left unheard.



Particles of consequence pronounce themselves, pointing their fingers at me.

You beat and scarred me when I was less than three.

Why must I acknowledge guilt for that which I am not the cause?

I never was what you hoped for. I’m am not only disposable, I am parasite and desirable for termination.

I know you wish you had that abortion you tell me everytime toy’re drunk or just out of frusration.

Your defect daughter.

Your punishment and blame. You weren’t one of those girls, somehow I’m to blame.

We’ll never have any sort normal, loving relationship, we’ll always resent, get phyical. We’ll always be the same.

Look away.

We have nothing left to say.

…but Mommy I love you,
Truly I do.

Oh my, Leonardo…

Leonardo da Vinci

Is one’s company a reflection of self?

Do we choose friends we see to be like our selves, based on personal qualities of which we are proud?

Do we choose friends based on quality? What we find desirable and we wish we had ourselves?

In the same respect do those we hate the most often bear aspects we dislike or fear to be true about ourselves?

Humans are narcissists.

We are so arrogant.

Some say the Mona Lisa was a femine version of the artist himself.

We all want to be seen. You are no different, my leonardo.

We are so attracted to ourselves.

What is love?

Is this love?
What is love?

I’m almost certain I know, but at times I doubt because this just has to be more.

Love is not an effective enough word.

You are everything and I adore your every molecule.

You’ve seen me at my worst and rarely enough at me best but still it’s me you’re with loved and spoiled more tha your past rest.

I doubt that at this point I could exist without you.

I don’t think I could breathe. I would not want to pull air from a world without out you into my lungs and if your heart stopped beating, I feel with certainty mine would too.

We are perfect, and we so fit.

I want to be your last, and always.

Your every word, breath, move and touch mean everything to me.

I need you in my life always no matter how good or bad it turns out to be.